As parents,we must allocate time to observe what our children are doing and take time to talk to them. It is not enough for them to excel only in their academic achievement/success in their careers. Lately,I have seen too much improper behaviours...
It is better to start early when our kids are younger and old habits die hard.First is to find out their values by observing their daily lives and actions. Next is to have a really good conversations with our children from time to time.All of us are very busy with our own business and careers but I think we shall fail in our duties if we don't take time and make a real effort to instill good values and conduct for our own children.
To undertake such efforts,we ourselves must be knowledgable as well as be examples of good behaviours.
It is not easy being a father for the last 25 years. IMHO, our children need our guidance all the time. By the way, to be a good guide, we also must be guided.
Below is a portion of what I wrote on 26/11/2004:
Our children are 'amanah' from Allah swt to us.As parents,we must be very concerned about our children aqidah,ibadah and aklaq.The 'tanggung jawab' is very heavy indeed-'tanggung' mean responsible,'jawab' means amswerable/accountable.
Below is a hadith for our reference:
Prophet Muhammad - the Final Messenger of God, may God bless him and give him peace, reported that God the Exalted said: "I created My servants in the right religion, but the devils made them go astray." (Reported in Sahih Muslim.) The Messenger of God, may God bless him and give him peace, also said: "Each child is born in a state of fitrah, but his parents make him a Jew or a Christian." (Reported in Sahih al-Bukhari and Sahih Muslim).
Absolutely agree with you. We now live in the most trying and challenging times. Sometimes I wonder what is in store for our future generation...and I shudder everytime when I think about it!
Posted by: DadofFourDad | Wednesday, February 21, 2007 at 09:18 AM
Agreeable, Pak Adib. As I am about to become a father middle of this year, it becomes clearer to me how important that we take care of our children.
It all begins from the family unit.
Posted by: omecool20 | Thursday, February 22, 2007 at 10:43 AM
To be good parent we must be able to change with circumstances and time; initial stage we act as teachers to instill good values, then we have to change to brotherly / sisterly kind of relation and when they grew up to their teens we have to change to that of friendship. The greatest challenge is to change ourselve to relate to their ages. Many parent fail because of this; they carry over the teacher/disciplinarian role too far and cause negative effect, me included.
Posted by: gukita | Monday, February 26, 2007 at 08:17 AM
Gukita,
Thanks for your inputs and sharing your experience. I am no better...we are also learning to be better parents.
Posted by: Adib | Monday, February 26, 2007 at 11:23 AM
And say God in Qur'an:
"O you who believe, protect yourselves and your families from the Hellfire whose fuel is people and rocks. Guarding it are stern and powerful angels who never disobey GOD; they do whatever they are commanded to do".(66:6)
Posted by: Ahmad | Tuesday, March 06, 2007 at 04:00 PM